210710 1941

I hardly say "NO" to you, but why you keep turning me down?
It's like falling into a deep valley.
Your "NOs" hurt me badly.
It's excruciating.

170710 0101

恐惧感突袭而来，害怕失去那个曾经，这个现在。


现实就是残酷， 残忍得一切美好都像是噩梦的前奏。
它让你相信，让你赴汤蹈火。


我还以为我有足够的勇气拥抱和放手。
以为只要我放弃，牺牲了，迎接我的就是美好结局。

我们都是公主，活在自己的童话世界。

我太自以为是了。
对不起，谢谢。

too pissed to see the f****** time and date

Ok, I know it's totally not the time for me to get pissed or emotional right now, at this exact moment, eve of my exam..
This gonna be a short one, only to shout out my anger, I am getting quite furious lately.
I am not that tolerant for your information, so bark off please..WTF!!
I am cursing, you force me too.

070610 0225---- PANIC ATTACK & PHOBIA

Listening to Damien Rice, "The Blower's Daughter".
I should probably be sleeping in this hour of the night but sleep eluded me.
Well, I have  a TEST tomorrow, to be exact, it's a RETAKE TEST.
What make it worse, is the subject that I loathe to the extreme,trust me,I'm not at all exaggerating.
CHEMISTRY just isn't my thing, never been my thing.
Looks like I have serious communication barrier with all the GREAT CHEMIST, no offence.
Have I prepared enough? Am I prepared? GOD KNOWS!!

P/S: to those reading this post, Damien Rice is an awesome singer, he touches people's heart with his amazing voice and guitar. Do hear some of his songs. 

210510 1449

A series of number marks that today was a totally nightmare for me. A nightmare that I thought I won't recall again since I already 19, one that I thought I have enough mental power to handle, or strike beautifully perharps. Well, I'm wrong. Totally different from what Taylor Swift sings, "today was a fairytale", ironically,I hope it was.
Sometimes, things won't change even if you have grown up. Facts are still facts, those that used to haunt you still do. You want to get over but you just can't.
I want to make this a perfect day for all of us, try to mend things back, back to where I believe is the most perfect. But, now I just want to run away, back to where I am alone there. It might be better for me. I don't need to pick a side to stand with all the distance away. I don't want to see the war. It was hard back when I was a child and it's still not easy now.
Forgive me, but I do believe I have done all the right things and I trust you had too. I will always have the best interest of you in my heart. Love prevails.